


Unforgettable

by NovaCaelum



Category: Black Sails
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Anal Sex, Deaf!Flint, First Meetings, M/M, Slow Burn, masturbation (mentioned)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-19
Updated: 2019-02-23
Packaged: 2019-07-14 09:13:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 14,449
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16037432
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NovaCaelum/pseuds/NovaCaelum
Summary: John couldn't keep his eyes away from the guy with beautiful green eyes and fiery red hair; he wanted to know everything about him, yet all his attempts failed.





	1. First Meeting

**Author's Note:**

> Based on the _Prompt, #258: Deaf Flint meeting Silver for the first time in a non-cliche way ;)_ From the [Black Sails Kink Meme](https://blacksailskinkmeme.tumblr.com) over on Tumblr.
> 
> I did sorta intend this to only be one chapter, but I got carried away. This is more of John fawning over James too, rather than James just meeting John so I guess, not a full fill of the prompt. I just felt inspired by it.

John wanted to know this guys name, he saw him every morning on the same train as he headed into work; he was gorgeous, bright green eyes and fiery red hair. John couldn't keep his eyes off him, but each time he'd even tried to make contact, it went to shit, he was practically brushed off. Once, he'd _accidentally_ bumped into the man and he'd apologised profusely, hoping really to start a conversation but all he'd gotten in response was a nod and the guy moved to give more room. John called that attempt number one, he wasn't ready to give up though and the second attempt came when the man dropped something on the floor; John picked it up and passed it back with one of his signature smiles, "Hi. I'm John." It was weak and John will freely admit it, but he figured at least it was a start, but all he got was a nod of thanks and then the fiery hair vanished somewhere into the crowd.

 _Attempt two failed._ As the days wore on, more attempts came and John felt like he was falling into an abyss of endless cycles. Slowly, he began just sitting there, watching the man read a book, his eyes following when as he departed from the train. John felt like he was losing his mind, he felt like a schoolgirl hopelessly chasing after her crush; he was a grown man, he knew he shouldn't be acting like this.

But yet, when another day came, he was watching and waiting for him to get on the train, surprised to see him with someone for once. Maybe they worked together? _No_ , that guy was more than attractive, of course he was in a relationship. John's eyes still kept wandering though, landing on the guy he was interested in, which is when he spotted him signing something; the new person smiling and signing back. And when he grinned, John could have died, his smile was beautiful, the signs were rushed and John only had a basic knowledge and he definitely couldn't read signing that fast.

Now he knew why he felt like this guy hadn't been paying any attention to him, it was because he was deaf. John suddenly felt extremely giddy, like new life was running through him; at least he wasn't just being ignored. Now he had no idea how to start up a conversation though, he was so used to using slick words and subtle voice changes to get attention; he sighed, observing the signed conversation with a slight interest. Then, at his usual stop, he departed with the guy that got on the train with him and John ran a hand through his hair, frustrated with how to make this work out.

* * * *

_"You know that guy was staring at you? The one with the curly hair."_

He chuckled, nodding, _"He has been for the last week. He's cute I suppose, he tried talking to me once when he picked up my folder off the floor. I managed read his lips, he didn't say much really, but I learned that his name is John. I don't think he realised I'm deaf. It was amusing to see how he reacted when I didn't say anything to him."_

_"James. I'm used to how infuriating you can be, I see it on a daily basis. Is that why you asked me to get the train with you today? So he knew?"_

James grinned up at his friend, quickly signing, _"Of course I did, Billy."_ He paused, thinking about John, _"He looked surprised today, maybe he'll stop looking."_

 _"Sure."_ Billy gave James a look that read as: you're out of your mind. James just rolled his eyes, they made their way into work; James only somewhat hoped it would be the end of whatever John was trying to do, but he hadn't given up yet.

~ ~ ~ ~

John was exhausted, but he knew, even if it sounded crazy, that it was worth it; between work and keeping up a healthy personal life, he'd now added sign language classes to the list. He felt, at least by making his basic knowledge a little better, then he stood a decent chance to communicate with the mystery man; so, he was sat in his usual spot on the train, waiting. He perked up when the man got on at the usual place, John shifted in his chair so he was perfectly across from him and he waved; the man looked surprised and tentatively waved back, _"Hi, I'm John."_ His signs were slow, a little nervous to try this, _"I'm not very good at sign language."_

_"I'm James. I read your lips before when you said your name, thanks for picking up my folder. You're doing fine."_

God, he finally knew his fucking name! John felt like he could actually get to know this guy a bit better, _"Are you off to work?"_

_"Yeah, the usual boring commute,"_ He kept his own signs slower than normal, not wanting to have John sitting there confused; after all, Billy had been right, John still wasn't giving up, _"What about you?"_

John nodded, the train was starting to fill up so he quickly moved to sit besides James so their conversation wouldn't get interrupted by people passing, _"I work as a barista. It's fun."_

_"Can you make the cool designs? I work with computers, it can be boring sometimes but it can get busy and I like doing it."_ It was oddly easy for James to talk to John like this and he enjoyed it, he'd thought John was strange, constantly staring at him; then actually putting effort into signing to him. It made James feel warm inside, no-one had ever made such an effort with him before. 

John pulled out his phone, _"I have some pictures."_ He unlocked his phone and found the right folder in his gallery, handing it over so James could see. John watched as James intently looked through them, James examined each design, rather impressed with the work John had done; in that moment, he decided to quickly put his number into John's contact list before handing the phone back. James felt like he was being a little irrational but somehow John brought it out in him. 

_"They're great,"_ He smiled at John, his stop was coming up soon and he knew he'd have to at least warn John about the new number, _"I hope you don't mind, I put my number in your phone, if you ever want to chat."_

John felt a blush creeping up to his cheeks, he'd had people chasing after him in the past, trying to get his number and failed attempts from guys who'd wrote their number down for him; but, he was actually interested in James, he wanted to get to know him better, _"I'd really like that,"_ James stood up and John felt a wave of disappointment run through him when he realised they'd reached James' stop, _"See you later."_

_"Bye, it was nice chatting."_ And he departed, leaving John to slouch into his seat, but he couldn't wait to get into work and tell his best-friend everything. 


	2. First Date

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James and John finally go on a date together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so bad a titles lmao.

It had been a few weeks since John and James had their conversation on the train, they'd either been texting or making small conversation when they saw each other; just getting to know each other, but John hadn't been confident enough to ask James out on an official date yet, he wasn't even completely sure why he was so nervous about it. John had picked up on James flirting with him; those green eyes looked even more beautiful peering through long eyelashes, the smooth motion of his hands when he signed. Even so much as sly touches when they sat together on the train but John was nervous, he didn't want to assume anything or rush into something and have James tell him it was mixed signals.

It was the only thing he could think about as he sat on the train home; his eyes kept flittering to the spot where James normally sat, the seat empty since it was later in the day. His phone buzzed in his pocket and he took it out, checking to see who'd messaged him and he smiled when James' name lit up his screen. He unlocked his phone to read it, ' _Hey, do you fancy going for lunch this weekend?_ '

His heart thumped in his chest, joy felt like it zapped through his veins; he eagerly typed out, ' _Yes! I'd love to._ ' Then he realised that sounded completely pathetic so he simply sent: ' _Sure, sounds good to me. Where should we meet up?_ ' Then he turned his phone over, closing his eyes with a happy sigh; when he phone buzzed to life again, he quickly checked what the message said.

' _There's this cafe called Topped Off, they do light lunches and coffee. Say 12 pm on Saturday?_ '

John grinned from ear to ear, feeling like his face would split at any moment and all his joy would seep out onto the floor of the train carriage, ' _That's fine, see you on Saturday then :)_ ' For a second after he sent it, he realised the emoji might be a little too much, but he couldn't take it back now; he slid his phone back into his pocket as the train pulled into his stop and practically skipped home. He felt like a child on Christmas morning, he didn't want that to change though, it made him feel good; he couldn't wait for Saturday to come.

* * *

John's eyes couldn't stop flicking to the door, he sipped away at his second cup of coffee, his right foot tapping the floor gently as he waited; he knew he was early and he should have known that James would turn up perfectly on time. But he couldn't help himself, James made John feel like he was invincible; he perked up when he saw familiar fiery hair appear in the door-way, James was early too but only by five minutes which comforted John that at least, he was clearly looking forward to it. He waved James over who smiled and joined him at the table; he watched James get comfortable and then signed, _"Hey, do you want a drink?"_ He was glad his own didn't look too empty, he didn't want James to think he was weird.

_"Hey. You haven't been waiting long, have you? I usually get a hot chocolate from here, they're lovely."_

John smiled, _"No, about five minutes. I thought it would be better to sit in here and wait for you. Do you want to order food as well?"_

_"Not quite yet. A drink will do for now."_

John stood up, smiling again and went to go get James his hot chocolate; once he had it and sat back down, _"Do you mind if I ask a personal question?"_

_"Of course not, what's up?"_

John waited a moment, sighing heavily before signing, _"What's the worst thing about being deaf?"_

_"When people don't realise I'm not ignoring them when they talk to me. And instead of thinking rationally, I can tell that they're yelling when they repeat themselves. It makes me feel like I'm stupid, it frustrates me."_

John could tell, by the motion of his hands and the look it his eyes that it upset James, he wanted to comfort him more than anything, _"Yeah, I know it can be hard, they're far more ignorant that you could ever be. Honestly, people can be dicks. I actually have a prosthetic left leg, I know it's a different situation, but it was hard for me at first,"_ He usually didn't give that information up so freely, but he wanted James to understand that, in his own way, he knew what it was like to be judged, _"Before I got my prosthetic, people made me feel incompetent. It was hard relying on a crutch, the looks I got. People would always ask how. Or just assume I was in the army. It gets annoying pretty fast."_

_"I wouldn't have known if you didn't say, it's not noticeable, especially while you're wearing jeans. People like to make assumptions though. I've made friends with people who are wonderful. I do get asked about my deafness. Was I born with it? If not, how did it happen?"_

John nodded, _"People address that whenever it's comfortable. I'm the same."_

_"Your sign language has improved a lot."_

_"Thank you. I've been practising a lot, the extra lessons really help, I'd be useless on my own,"_ He picked up a menu and motioned to it, _"I'm getting hungry, are you happy to order?"_

James nodded, he picked up a menu too and took a sip from his drink before trying to decide what he wanted to eat; he felt warm inside from having John being so open and honest with him, he'd completely forgotten about his drink and food until John brought up the idea of eating. James did feel hungry, he'd just gotten so caught up in their conversation that it was but a fleeting thought in his mind. Eventually, his eyes settled on the chicken club sandwich, he'd had it before so he knew it was good; he placed the menu on the table and John looked up, _"Chicken club sandwich."_

 _"That sounds lovely,"_ John had signed in return, his smile lighting up his face, _"I was thinking about the Soba Noodles with Beef. I'll go order."_ He left the table and went to wait in the queue, it had gotten a little busier in the cafe now, John put it down to most people's lunch times at work.

James quietly sipped away at his hot chocolate while he waited; he still couldn't figure out why John was interested in him. John was also fussing over things, first he ordered James' drink and now his food. James had experienced a fantastic relationship in the past, eventually James' deafness became an issue for his now-ex...But that was in the past, he could move forward from it. When John returned to the table, James smiled, half-hidden behind his cup; John returned it and took a drink of his own; they made a little conversation while waiting for the food. Mostly it was about the dinner-rush, John understanding that completely from working in a coffee-shop, and when James had asked if he got sick of coffee, John laughed, brushing it off with a wave of his hand before replying that, surprisingly, it didn't bother him at all; the enthusiasm of his hand movements assuring James that he did sincerely enjoy coffee.

When their food arrived, their conversation died down, only simple signs made to each other between bites of food; John made James try some of his noodles since he'd never had them before. So James had given John a bit of his chicken sandwich with a smile almost as bright as the sun and John couldn't have refused if he tried. Once they finished eating, they relaxed back into their chairs, John sighing happily. James signed to him: _"I guess you enjoyed that then."_

 _"Yeah, it was lovely,"_ John returned, _"Do you want another drink? Then we could go for a walk or something?"_

James smiled, nodding; spending time with John was nice, _"That sounds good to me."_ John smiled too, getting up to go order another coffee and hot chocolate; James watched from his seat, he had to admit that John was adorable. He'd been open about his own problems too, which made James feel comfortable, he obviously didn't want pity and James understood what it was like to be judged. James was so lost in his own world that when a hand gently touched his shoulder, he almost jumped out of his skin; he turned, his brows furrowing when he saw his ex stood there, _"What do you want?"_

_"Is that a way to greet anyone? I thought it would be nice to catch up."_

James rolled his eyes, _"Why would I want to do that? I'm busy, go away."_

At the counter, John happily took their drinks, when he saw someone he didn't know talking to James, hands rushed. He couldn't make any sense of it all but he knew by James face that he was uncomfortable so he quickly returned to the table, taking a seat, _"Who's this?"_

"My name is Charles and you could ask me yourself."

John looked up, this guy seemed very rude, "Well, excuse me, your highness. I didn't know you decided who I could speak to, I asked James," John smirked when Charles' face twitched, "Now, would you kindly fuck off? We're in the middle of something," He pulled out a small notebook from his pocket and flicked through to one of the pages with a couple of his own ideas for coffee designs then passed them over to James, "I'm sure you're a lovely fellow deep down, but we're busy. Bye bye."

Charles huffed, waving to James before he left. John watched him go with a triumphant smile and when he turned back to James, he was sat there, confused and impressed, _"What was that?"_

 _"I just made it look like we were having an important meeting so he would leave. Seemed like he was very rude,"_ James smiled, John was so thoughtful, he handed back the book and watched as John put it away, _"I called him your highness and he seemed annoyed. How do you know a guy like that?"_

James shifted in his seat, John's eyebrows raised, _"I...He's someone I knew a long time ago, we don't really talk anymore and he's an ass."_ He wasn't quite ready to admit that they'd been together for almost a year, that was in his past now though, when he'd been stupid enough to think that Charles was a nice guy.

 _"Okay,"_ James almost shot back in bewilderment, he wouldn't have thought John was the type of person to let that go so quickly; he'd expected to be hounded until John got an answer...He was a lot different that what James had assumed of him, _"You don't have to explain it. I can understand why, he's a jerk. It's fine, if you want to, you will. Don't force it."_

James smiled, **oh** , this seemed far too good to be true, but he wouldn't let it go. He picked up his hot chocolate and took a gulp, it had cooled down since John had brought it too the table, perfect enough to drink. So he basked in it, signing a little to John about those designs that he'd seen; James learned they were something that John wanted to propose to his coffee shop, along with some seasonal ones. John smiled and blushed when James had signed that they were fantastic, he was still a little nervous about showing them to his boss; she was quite a tough person to please but knowing that James liked them gave him a whole new confidence about it. They finished up their drinks and headed out, James leaving a tip at the table since John had paid the bill; they took a walk to the near-by park and headed around the trails.

Half-way through they took a seat on a bench and chatted about what they were going to be doing for the next few days; James had a big meeting coming up at work and John decided it would be good to discuss his ideas with his boss, having James rooting for him was nice too, _"Thank you."_

_"No need for that. Those designs are amazing, I'll have to come to the shop sometime. If that's okay?"_

_"Yes, of course. I'll text you the address later, I'll be working tomorrow so you should drop-by. I'll make something extra special, a surprise for you."_

James' eyebrows rose, curiosity stretching over his face, he wondered what John would do. Getting to know him so well was nice, _"Okay. I'm looking forward to it,"_ His phone buzzed in his pocket and he pulled it out to read the message, eyebrows furrowing when he saw it was from Billy, asking him to come in, _"I've got to get to work, there's some sort of emergency that apparently no one else can solve. Sorry to cut the date so short."_

 _"Don't worry about it. I'll text you later, get going,"_ James smiled, he was a little annoyed and sad that he had to leave so early, it had been going so well, even with the interruption of Charles. He blinked in surprise when a soft pair of lips hit his cheek, he touched the spot, staring at John, _"Go. It's okay. We can always do this again."_ James smiled, nodding; why was John so sweet? He stood up, bidding goodbye before he left for the subway, leaving John sitting there. John sighed, resting back against the bench for a moment; he'd been so impulsive, but James didn't seem to mind, in fact, the smile he'd given was so soft and sweet, that told John just how much he'd enjoyed it. He couldn't wait to see James again.


	3. Feelings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James finally gets to see John at work.

James had promised to visit the coffee shop, so when the bell jingled and John watched James walk in, he couldn't stop smiling. John waved in greeting then began signing, _"What can I get you?"_

_"Large cappuccino please."_

While James waited, he noticed the other barista eye him up and he glared, wondering what his problem was, "I know you," James shrugged, pointing to his ears, John turned around, passing the cup over to James, "John, can you ask him if he dated Charles? I'm sure I know his face."

_"Did you date Charles? Jack said he knows you."_

James swallowed, he hadn't intended for John to find out like this, he wanted to explain everything himself, _"I did. Years ago. I remember the name Jack."_ He watched John turn and speak to Jack directly.

"I thought so."

John didn't bother signing that, he figured that it wasn't really worth mentioning, they could discuss it more at a later time, _"Are you going to take a seat? I'll bring over your surprise,"_ James nodded, he cradled his cup and found an empty table where he could just sit and ignore the rest of the people. He pulled out a book from his satchel and settled back; the coffee John made was lovely too, he looked up when a hand landed on the table and he smiled when he saw John stood there, holding a lovely muffin. John put the plate down, then signed, _"I made this myself. I hope it's okay."_

_"It looks perfect, thank you."_

_"Good. I'm sorry about Jack, he doesn't have a filter. He needs to learn when to stop."_ James smiled, nodding as John headed back to work; James got sucked back into his book, when he took a bite out of the muffin and had to hold his breath, he glanced over to the counter. John was busy and James grinned, he'd have to thank John again later, he turned back to his book and happily settled in his seat.

John rushed around making drink after drink, the rush of lunch was always his favourite thing though, the smell of the coffee and the hum of the shop pleased him; he cleared some tables and felt a little sad when he reached James' and he was already gone. Of course he understood, he was busy and James probably wouldn't have found a space to say goodbye, he just hoped that James might have text him, he would have to check on his break. He took the cup and plate, placing them in the tub of other dishes then headed back to start off the dishwasher; once he got back onto the counter and became busy again, his mind was pulled away from James.

* * *

James hated to leave so quickly, but he needed to be back at work, he sent a quick message to John though, _'Can we meet up later for dinner? I'd like to cook for you too, the muffin was fantastic.'_ Then he got wrapped up in work, hoping that when he got a chance that he'd have a text back from John; he was a little nervous about having him over, but he wanted to talk more with John, hear his voice. It gave him the excuse to talk more about what had happened with Charles, how he could use hearing-aids if he wanted but preferred not to. He enjoyed having the peace of it and usually used them at home, a spare set at his job if an important meeting came up.

Now, James needed to decide what to cook too. Maybe he could make them steaks, he had some in the house; it was quick too, simple enough that John wouldn't think he was trying too hard. It could definitely work out, lost in his own world, he jumped when a hand touched his shoulder, looking up to see Billy grinning as he signed, _"You okay? Your head is in the clouds."_

 _"Sorry. I am working, look,"_ Billy looked over at the screen, nodding; when he turned back to James though, he was still grinning, brows raised, _"Can't I be happy?"_

_"You're usually miserable at work. It's strange, what happened?"_

_"I saw John today,"_ Billy remembered the strange man from the train, the one who James had said was trying to talk to him; he knew that they'd gone out together the day before, which James had kept under-wraps. Now this, whatever he was so ridiculously happy about, _"I went and got coffee earlier, he was working. He made me a muffin."_

 _"You like him,"_ James sighed, Billy always figured him out so quickly, _"Oh, you really like him. Well, good luck with that."_

 _"Fuck off."_ Billy grinned, simply waving as he headed off, leaving James to work. The day passed by, a little too slowly for James liking, once he got chance for a break, he pulled out his phone and checked to see if John had replied yet, he smiled when he saw the message there, _'Sure, let me know where and when, I'd love to. I'm really glad you enjoyed the muffin.'_ James typed out a simple reply, asking John to meet him at his work address, they'd be able to get the train together then walk the short distance from the station to James' apartment. It would give them chance to have a conversation before James would be busy with cooking; he went back to work once John had confirmed that it would be okay. James couldn't stop thinking about John the entire time.

Once the end of the day came, James rushed out of the office, flipping a finger at Billy when he shot him a thumb's-up, he found John waiting outside and calmly approached him, _"Early?"_

 _"A little, Jack was closing up today, so I just thought I'd wait here,"_ John smiled, it brightened James up and they began walking to the station together, their conversation couldn't really continue while they walked; once they reached the station though, John started signing again, _"How was work?"_

James smiled, which made John feel giddy, _"It was busy and Billy was being annoying, both just usual day-to-day things. Billy's likes to make conversation while working."_ It was nice, watching how fluidly James' hands moved as he signed, it made John want to do this every day. Have James come home, ask about his day-- **Wait** , he was definitely getting too far ahead of himself, they were barely dating and John was already thinking about that? Too far. He definitely needed to berate himself about that later.

They boarded the train together, John decided to ask a different question to keep his stupid fantasy at bay, _"So, do you live in a house?"_

_"Apartment, but it's decently sized. It could be a small house, if you looked at it that way."_

_"I live in an apartment too, unfortunately, my salary doesn't make it look very extravagant. I like it anyway, it's nice, enough for just me."_

James smiled again, _"As long as it feels like home,"_ They soon reached James' stop, squeezing past people as they departed the train; James led them to his apartment, John thought that it did look rather nice, it was bigger than his own, two people could probably live here comfortably. James let them in, walking to the kitchen with John in tow, _"You can take a seat at the table. I've got everything sorted for dinner, do you want a drink while you wait?"_

_"Coffee is fine."_

James nodded, he set the coffee pot on and got out a frying pan along with a pot, he grabbed everything he needed from the fridge, glad that the fresh steaks looked good enough to eat raw. He got out a wine-bucket, filling it with some ice then placing the bottle of Malbec over the ice, he then placed the bucket into the centre of the table. John watched as James worked his way wonderfully around the kitchen, seasoning the steaks with sea salt and peppercorns, clearly knowing how to gently heat the pan before he dropped the steaks in, he boiled some water in the pot, dropping what looked like finely sliced green beans into it. James took out a second pan, beginning to heat up a little oil while the steaks sizzled away; he turned to check the coffee, making up a cup for John that he happily handed over, signing, _"It won't be a nice as the one you make in your shop."_

 _"It's perfect,"_ He smiled, a chuckle rumbling in the back of his throat at James' words. James went back to cooking, checking the steaks, he flipped them to begin cooking the other side, he dropped some sliced onions and peppers into the other frying pan, with a dash of garlic and salt for seasoning. John thought it was amazing how he looked like a professional chef, the kitchen was clearly a place he was comfortable in. James set the table with knives and forks, a couple of wine glasses too, he also filled up a pitcher with water, settling that down with smaller glasses. He had some leftover brownies that he could warm up for dessert if John wanted anything more; James was glad to see that the steaks were cooked nicely, he finished them off, drying them before plating them up, he gave the onions and peppers a good stir before placing them onto the plates too. The green beans took a quick drain and joined the plate before he happily placed one in front of John and the other where he was sitting, _"Smells lovely. I bet it tastes even better, thank you."_

James smiled, he was happy that John was so comfortable signing now, it definitely came a lot easier than the first time they'd signed on the train; he felt happy to tell John, maybe after dessert, he could talk about it, _"Would you like a glass?"_ He grabbed the bottle when John nodded, easily opening it and pouring a decent amount in both their glasses; he put it back on ice then signed again, _"This goes really well with rump steak."_

John cut up some of his steak, eating a good fork full, following it with a sip of the wine; James was right, the richness brought out the flavour. James had seasoned it so perfectly anyway, John could probably close his eyes and think that a Michelin star chef had cooked for him, John placed his cutlery on the plate as he signed, _"It's amazing. Really, thanks for doing this."_ James waved him off, enjoying his own steak; it really wasn't much, something that he could happily cook himself for a Sunday meal, yet John was savouring every bite like it was a lost delicacy. Their conversation was light between eating, just talking about what they had planned for the rest of the week; James was going to be pretty busy with work, he had some unit-testing to do a for a new software that the company wanted to roll out. John would be working on the Autumn and winter menu's with Jack, designing and probably throwing out a million ideas for drinks; it was John's favourite time of year though, everything was always warm in the shop.

They finished up and John took the plates, beginning to wash up before James could stop him; James watched, amused. John fit so perfectly in the kitchen, he let James dry though, so he could put them away where he liked them; it was nice, it felt so intimate and homely, like they did this every day. Once it was done, James signed, _"Would you like dessert? I was thinking brownies and ice cream, we could put a movie on."_

 _"Yeah, that sounds really nice."_ James flashed John a smile, getting the ice cream out of the freezer, he took some bowls out and a scoop; John leaned against the island, watching as James took out the left-over brownies, setting one each into the bowls before he put them into the microwave to warm up. John did have a weak spot for brownies, he didn't know if he'd ever told James, but it was almost like James knew him, including his weak-spots; it was nice, when he signed, he found a way to flourish his hands so carefully, it was like a hidden flirt and only James would know what it meant.

James handed him a bowl, smiling as John took it, _"We can see what's on Netflix,"_ He grabbed his own bowl then led them into the lounge; they settled on the couch, James picking The Hitman's Bodyguard for them to watch. He made sure the subtitles were turned on and gently tapped John's thigh, getting his attention, _"Are you okay with the subtitles?"_

_"Of course, this is your home. I want you to be comfortable watching anything with me. There's a really good film that I watched before, we'll have find it next time."_

James could feel a little bit of a blush creeping up his neck, he clutched his bowl, eating a little as the film began; the way John had signed _next time_ was so promising, his fingers a little playful as he made the movements to create those words. James wanted to see him again, after their date had been rudely interrupted and then cut short, he wanted to make it up to John. He still needed to explain the Charles situation, especially since Jack mentioned them previously dating, John hadn't brought it up though; maybe he didn't want to push the subject, just as James didn't want to start grilling him about his leg. Without saying anything, they'd found a common ground and it was nice; he finished up his brownie and placed the bowl onto the table, smiling when John slid his on top. They soon settled back, happily watching the movie together.

When the credits started rolling, James turned to John, melting when he saw him fast asleep; he stood up, wondering for a second what to do. He didn't feel right leaving him sleeping on the couch, it wasn't exactly very comfortable, when James was working on his laptop, he'd found that out the hard-way; so he carefully manoeuvred so he could pick John up, gently, so he didn't wake him. It was a little awkward carrying him to the bedroom without bumping into anything, but James got there, he softly laid John on his bed and decided to get some extra work done on his computer while John slept. He settled down, watching John a while while his computer whirred to life, he found a report that needed some finishing touches and got to work on it, glancing over at John every once in a while just to make sure he was okay.

* * *

John could see it, almost touch it but it was barely there, the memory half-clouded by something a lot like fog; as if he shouldn't go there, a warning. But he couldn't help himself, he kept pushing and then the pain came, shooting through his shin...The one that no longer even existed. John sprang up, half falling as he rushed into the bathroom, spilling his guts into the toilet; as he gasped, gripping at the toilet bowl, a soft pair of hands pulled his hair back. **Shit**. Why did this have to happen now? He didn't want James to see him like this, he pushed away from the toilet and placed his hands on James' chest; the look James gave him wasn't pity, only worry and concern. James helped John up, letting him rest against him, "Thank you." He headed over to the sink and washed his mouth out, needing to get the awful taste out of his mouth.

When John turned, James was stood there smiling and he signed, _"Come on, lets go back to bed,"_ John nodded, he followed James back into the bedroom and flopped onto the bed, **Jesus**. What on Earth did John do to deserve someone so wonderful? He laid back, watching with his eyebrows raised as James searched for something, he instantly sat-up when he saw James put in some hearing aids, "Are you okay? I was going to tell you tonight," James pointed to his ears, "But you fell asleep and you were too peaceful to wake. Sorry."

"Don't. I told you before, whenever you're ready to tell me something, I'll be here. I like you and I don't want things to rush by all at once. I want to enjoy it," John reached out and took James' hand, "I had a really vivid nightmare. I'm fine now. It's really nice to hear your voice, it's lovely."

James smiled, bringing John's hand up so he could kiss the fingers, "Yours is too. I lost my hearing when I was twenty, sixteen years ago. I find it easier now to have my own little bubble where no-one can pester me. But you--" James laughed, shaking his head, "You broke through that. You made me want to know everything about you. You put real effort into learning sign language...It made me so happy to know that I wasn't just something to look at. Charles treat me that way, we were together for a year, he always had me like some kind of prize on his arm. When he found out that I can use hearing aids, he made me wear them all the time. I still rely on sign language, he just refused that and it was dragging me down, I felt pushed out of every conversation. Billy dragged me away from all that, he was my first hearing friend outside of the Deaf community, he made me dump Charles in front of all his friends and I loved every second of it."

"James," John smiled softly, reaching out to caress James' cheek with his free hand; he pulled him into a kiss, so soft that James was sure John thought he might break. When they broke the kiss, John settled back, clearing his throat, "Thank you for being so open with me. The nightmare I had was about my leg," He gestured to the spot where his prosthetic lay, "I was attacked, by some people that I had trusted. They beat me to a pulp and sliced my leg apart, my best-friend found me, she rushed me straight to the hospital but it couldn't be saved. It's been very hard to trust people since. I'm always on guard, but when I saw you on that train, at first it was just an attraction and I wanted your attention, but as I got to know you, everything changed. You're so different, I grew to like _you_."

James pressed their foreheads together, "Thanks, I know how hard it can be to open up, I'm so happy that you want to be honest with me. Are you happy to still stay here?"

"Yeah, it's really late anyway, I'll just need to take this off," So John did, and without his prosthetic, he felt a little naked, he rested it against the bed-side table, looking to James again; he still had no pity on his face, he reached out and traced the scars on John's thigh, anger creasing his forehead, "I'm okay, I promise. Could I do my laundry tomorrow? These will need a wash."

James nodded, he was about to withdraw his hand until John held him there, smiling, "Okay, that'll be fine."

"I'll probably have to get back to my place after and shower, everything's set up there."

"Will you be able to get back to sleep okay?"

"Yeah," This time, John let James go when he pulled away; he removed his shirt and got comfortable again on the bed, "I feel bad for this."

"Don't, I wasn't tired yet, I was just sat there," James hinted to the office desk in the corner, "I saw you rush into the bathroom, I didn't know what was going on."

"I didn't mean to worry you. You should get some sleep too, I don't mind the couch."

James shook his head, making sure John laid back down, "It's fine. I'm going to finish up on my computer, I have a guest-room set up, I'll just crash in there." He walked back over to his computer, finished up the report he'd been writing then saved everything before shutting down his computer; John hadn't fallen back to sleep when James turned to grab some clothes from his wardrobe, "It really is fine, get some more sleep. I'll leave these in tonight, just shout if you need me, okay?" John nodded, rather reluctantly from the look of things, James bade him goodnight though, grabbed some clothes and went to his guest room, leaving his clean clothes on top of the dresser, before he stripped to his boxers and clambered into the bed; he really hoped that John would get some more sleep before tomorrow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> They're both stupidly crushing on each other without saying anything. Hahaha, John's little fantasy of a happy life, James coming home to him :') He's such a hopeless romantic.


	4. Honesty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James and John finally admit their feelings.

When morning came, John was the first to wake; he quickly pulled off his pants, slipping his prosthetic back on before he grabbed his clothes and went downstairs, it took him a moment to find the washer, once he did, he shoved his clothes in, finding what he hoped was a spare robe to wrap around himself while he waited for everything to be clean and dry. He took it upon himself to have a little look through James' cupboards to see if he could find anything that looked good for breakfast.

John found some eggs and bacon, he could cook up a breakfast for them, a thank you for James letting him stay over and he could include some toast, it was simple enough, not too noisy either, so hopefully James would stay asleep until John could get dressed. By the time he found out the frying pan and the toaster, the washer beeped, he quickly headed into the utility room and set about putting his clothes into the dryer; just a little longer, then he could cook and go wake James.

While he was waiting, he heard the hum of the boiler then water running. **Damn** , James was awake, busy getting a shower at least, hopefully that gave John's clothes enough time to dry. He decided to put some coffee on while he waited, feeling relieved and grateful when the dryer came to a stop just as he heard the water switch off; John pulled his clothes out, enjoying the warmth as he quickly got dressed.

John smiled when he heard the creak of the stairs, beginning to cook up the bacon just as James walked into the kitchen, _"You didn't have to,"_ He then pointed to his ears, _"I had to take them out for the shower."_

John smiled to James, he quickly cracked the eggs into the pan then signed, _"Did you sleep alright?"_

 _"Yeah, did you manage to get a few decent hours?"_ John nodded, as he flipped the eggs, James suddenly remembered last night, how John had said he liked him; it seemed more serious than 'just friends' and James hadn't even responded to it. He mulled around John, getting plates and cutlery, John served up their food and James gently placed a hand on his arm, grabbing his attention for a moment before they sat down, _"Last night, you said you like me. I like you too, I want to see how things go between us. I can't say it will be easy though."_

John took in each sign, aware of how James' hand movements sunk a little towards the end, like he was unsure of things; John was happy that he felt the same though and he wanted their relationship to grow, _"I'm more than happy to go through the process, with you. No relationship is easy. Now, lets have breakfast, okay?"_

James smiled, they grabbed their plates and sat at the dining table together; John wanted to enjoy this moment as much as possible, he wouldn't be able to stick around long. John needed to get home and shower before getting out for work, he probably needed to get an Uber, just so he had some extra time; he enjoyed the breakfast with James, helping him with the dishes again before checking the time, it was beginning to get late, Jack would get up his ass if he didn't open the shop on time, _"If you have to get going, it's okay. Maybe we could meet up later? There's this nice little restaurant downtown, if you'd like to go?"_

 _"Yeah, sorry to bail out so early. Thanks for letting me stay and everything, I'll see you later."_ Without thinking, John kissed James on the cheek, making both of them blush at the contact, he rose his hands up in an apology, rubbing the back of his neck before he quickly went to put his shoes on. James felt stunned by the action, he held his cheek, a smile curling his lips as he thought about how soft John's lips had been on his skin; maybe Billy had been right, he was getting in at the deep-end with this one. Once John was all ready, he poked his head in, waving goodbye and signing, _"Uber's here. See you later."_ James only had time to return the wave before John vanished out the door again; he definitely needed to repay that little kiss at some point.

* * *

The message from James simultaneously made John smile and blush, _'Meet you at the restaurant, I haven't forgot about that kiss.'_ He'd also kindly attached the location for the restaurant; John couldn't focus on work for the rest of the day, even smiling when Jack accosted him for it. "Hey Jack, could I get a large americano please?" John bristled at that voice, he remembered it clearly, so rudely interrupting his and James' date. _Charles_. John made sure to focus on this one, scribbling the name onto the cup when Jack told him the order, like he hadn't heard Charles' loud voice; he made sure it was completely perfect before handing it over, "You work here?"

"Yep. Thank you for coming, enjoy your coffee." At least John had _tried_ to sound friendly, another order came and he was soon working again; he saw Jack out of the corner of his eye. Good, hopefully that meant Charles was gone, now John could get back to imagining what James had in store for later.

The end of his shift had come far too slowly for John's liking, but he helped Jack close up and headed off to the location that James had given to him, glaring when Charles stopped him at the end of the street. Jack headed home the opposite direction, so John didn't even have anyone to back him up, _fuck sake_ , "Hey you."

"What?" This time, he didn't bother putting on a friendly facade, he wasn't at work and there was nothing that Charles could do except complain to his face; or hit him, John sorta hoped it would be the latter, just to get Charles into trouble, he could take a punch if needed.

"You were the one with James before."

"You interrupted us, I'm in a bit of a hurry. What do you want?"

"I just wanted to warn you. You can't give him what he needs, you won't be enough, he's a freak in the sheets."

John shrugged, _okay_ , this guy was officially starting to piss him off, "I don't see how that is any of my business. Now, do you mind?" Charles smirked triumphantly and heading off; John rolled his eyes and continued his walk to the restaurant. He didn't care that they had dated, John had ex's too, some who were probably worse than Charles, it really wasn't anything to do with him; if Charles wanted to open his big mouth and try to ruin things, John was already in too deep to think about running away now.

James was waiting patiently outside the restaurant, when he saw John, a smile broke his face; John looked a little agitated though, even as he returned the smile, it didn't quite reach his eyes, _"What's wrong? You look annoyed."_

 _"I saw Charles again today, I'll explain it over dinner, can we go grab a table?"_ James nodded, he didn't want to press things, he'd let him open up once they were a little more comfortable; they walked in, getting seated fairly quickly, John explained what had happened with Charles, which made James frown, _"I don't care what he has to say, I can make my own opinion of you. You've only ever been nice to me and I don't base opinions on other people."_

James smiled, he grabbed a menu and started looking through, he wanted to catch John off guard when he finally brought up the kiss. It wasn't much, James was glad for that though, it was like John was being gentle and still letting things happen slowly--naturally; James didn't feel any pressure to return it, he did want to make John squirm though. He decided on a cottage pie with a mix of vegetables then placed the menu back onto the table, John seemed to have decided too and he smiled at James, _"I was thinking about the cottage pie, it sounds nice."_

 _"Okay, I'm going to get the Thai green chicken curry,"_ They picked their drinks too, John settled on a lemonade and James decided to try the latte. A waiter approached the table and James ordered for them; the waiter returned after that with their drinks, then they were left alone again, _"When the weather gets warmer you should come to the shop for an iced coffee. They're quite nice, and I'm not being biased."_

James grinned, shaking his head, _"You make nice coffee, you can be biased if you want,"_ He took a sip of the latte, it was decent, but he was sure John could do better; he put the cup down and slowly signed, _"So that kiss, it was very sweet."_

 _"I know it was sudden,"_ John could feel the heat rushing to his cheeks and he didn't know how to hide it, _"Sorry if I caught you off guard."_

Their food arrived before James could reply, John seemed to be intent on eating, so James brushed his hand over John's knee, getting his attention back; the surprised look on his face said more than whatever he might try to sign, _"It's not that, you just didn't give me chance to return it."_ James left it at that and began eating, smiling when he saw John rubbing the back of his neck, the blush clear on his cheeks. John didn't know how to respond to that, he picked up his utensils, distracting himself by eating; James seemed to be enjoying his food anyway, clearly content to have caught John off guard. In a way, John felt a little guilty for leaving James in the lurch, despite that though, he wasn't going to let James get away with surprising him.

They finished eating and headed out after they gave thanks; they took a walk to a nearby park and John smiled when James took a little box out of his pocket, he recognised the hearing aids as James put them in, "Thank you, once again. You'll have to let me cook for you, this weekend if that's alright?"

"You'll have to let me know if you're planning to kiss me again though. I'd like to be prepared this time."

"I'm not sure if I can promise that, when you're teasing me so much about it," John grinned, James could tell by his tone that he was saying that in jest and it made him smile; _so_ , there was at least a chance of a second kiss happening and he hoped it wouldn't just be a peck on the cheek, "You've gone red."

James touched his face, feeling even more embarrassed; he couldn't quite believe that he'd let his thoughts embarrass him so much. **God** , he was in deep, Billy had definitely hit the nail on the head, "Seems you've infected me, thinking about that kiss."

"You don't need to be embarrassed, just ask if you want another one." James rubbed his neck, it was very tempting, so he nodded. Then, John was closing the distance between them and James felt for a second that he didn't have his hearing aids in because all he could make sense of was the blood rushing through his body. Their lips touched and it was soft, softer than James could have imagined, even after the little teaser of a kiss; he found himself reaching out to touch John's cheek, the kiss growing just a little deeper. It satisfied his mind and he happily basked in the feeling, John smiled against James' lips, enjoying the feeling.

John was happy, James liked him, James wanted to kiss him, it was almost like a dream. When they pulled away, they were both smiling, James poked his tongue out to lick his lips, "Well, that was nice, better than the other kiss."

"Good," John suppressed the chuckle that rose in his throat; so James _was_ going to keep mentioning that then, "I'll kiss you as many times as it takes for you to forget about that."

James grinned, he loved messing with John like this though, it was fun and comfortable, like they did it all the time, "Might take a while."

"I'm fine with that." Then John was kissing James again, the world around them completely forgotten.


	5. Friendships

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James and John make things official and begin to meet each other's friends.

_"I still haven't officially met John yet."_

James rolled his eyes, Billy had been obsessed with bringing up that topic since he'd managed to pester James to breaking point about the date, _"Why are you like this? We've just started dating."_

 _"And you've already kissed him, don't play coy with me,"_ James could picture himself punching Billy, sometimes he was infuriating, _"Don't give me that look, even if he kissed you, you wanted it to happen. Come on, he seems like a nice guy, we could double date. Ben's been dying for a good meal out,"_ James could ask John about that, it did sound like it could be fun, _"I don't mean to pressure you, I just want to meet him."_

James sighed, Billy knew exactly how to make him feel at ease _"I'll ask John,"_ The look of delight on Billy's face made James frown, shaking his hand, _"I'm not promising anything though."_

 _"I wouldn't expect you to."_ Billy was grinning despite that though and James had to shake his head, they needed to go back to work anyway so he took his leave from the cafeteria, shooting a text to John on his walk back to his desk; James definitely felt like Billy knew him far too well for his own good.

* * *

"Oh, mon chéri, I know that face so well. Is it James?"

John grinned, he knew having Max as his best-friend was one of the best decisions that he made, "Yeah, he wants to go on a double date. This guy, Billy, who he works with, came up with the idea," He thought it was interesting and he was excited to get to know James' friends, "It's a little strange, I'm meeting his friends and we've kissed, but we're just dating, it isn't anything serious. I don't think so anyway."

"You can always ask him, I'm sure he already cares greatly for you," Max had that smile which told John, _don't even doubt me on this_ , he wondered how she learned to make such faces and convince him that nothing could stop him, "I never thought I'd be so lucky, just go for it. If he turns you down, then move on, it's all you can do." She had John nodding before she'd even finished the sentence, she was probably much more right than John would admit; he couldn't keep hiding behind the fear of turned down all the time and, so far, James had seemed interested, maybe he could take that chance. Before thinking too much into it, he replied to the message, not even trying to disguise how excited he was for another date.

* * *

James was nervous, Billy could easily see that and despite them making some small conversation while they waited for John, he kept zoning out, leaving Billy to discuss something else with Ben; when James finally perked up, Billy had to stop himself from sighing in relief, "Sorry I'm late!" John was signing too and it made Billy smile, he was as nice as James had said then, "There was an accident and I got held up a little."

"It's good to see you," James embraced John, turning him to Billy and Ben, "This is Billy, who you met briefly before and his boyfriend Ben. Ben isn't very good at sign language."

John smiled, waving to them both, he thought it was a little ironic how they were almost a mirror of couples...If he could say that about himself and James; Billy and Ben looked like they'd be polar opposites too, "I'm not very fluent either, but James is trying to help me out and I'm fitting in lessons where I can. It's very nice to officially meet you both."

With greetings sorted, they headed into the the restaurant, Billy had booked a decent table, it was at the back and quiet enough that they could hold a conversation; regardless, once they were seated, John had taken James' hand in his own, rubbing circles across the skin, "I've been so excited to try this place out." Ben picked up a menu, glancing through it with Billy looking over his shoulder.

John took the second distraction to sign to James, _"Are you okay with this?"_ James nodded, smiling brightly as he picked up a menu, he glanced through; the restaurant had a decent offer for two courses so he decided to share some paprika crispy potato wedges with John and decided on getting pasta with meatballs for his main while John decided on a cod in butter sauce. They all had a beer each, making the atmosphere a little more relaxed, Billy and Ben were sharing some nachos for their starter; John felt a little awkward when Ben would lick cheese off Billy's fingers and he'd managed to sign to James, _"Are they always like this?"_

James had to stifle a laugh, he dipped a wedge in the sauce and ate it, trying to ignore what John had signed; to be honest, he'd never done anything like this before and he'd only met Ben a few times. He knew Billy and Ben were close though, they were one of them obnoxiously in-love couples that made people want to look away, James thought it was endearing in a way and Billy looked like a different person in Ben's presence.

The night trickled by and John found a shared interest over coffee with Ben, offering him a membership card for the shop, so he could stop by sometime; James made sure to let Ben know it was the best thing in the world, John's talent of working around the machine was akin to a ballet dancer floating across a stage. John had blushed and shrugged it off, saying that James was just being kind to make him look good; when Billy and Ben were distracted with more drinks, James had signed, _"You're adorable when you're flustered and it's the truth, you're amazing behind that counter."_

John found himself being more flustered, he quickly placed a soft, sly kiss onto James' lips and began deciding if he wanted to get a dessert or not--mostly, he was just looking to avoid the reaction on James' face. They left dessert though, agreeing to try them out the next time that they could meet up like this; when they finally departed the restaurant, John had been pulled aside by Ben to talk a little more about coffee and James had a feeling, the second Billy had pulled him aside too, that it was a plan to divide and conquer, "He's lovely, you've snapped up a real good one there. He was still signing all night, I thought he'd just speak to you, especially since it's pretty new to him."

"It's natural between us now, like how you do it. It's nice, even with my hearing aids, I'm sure he knows they're not a miracle cure."

Billy scoffed, "He clearly likes you. And I saw that kiss, he was so gentle with you. Don't let this one go James, I think he'll be good to you."

Before James could reply though, a hand at his waist was pulling him back, Billy and Ben said their goodbyes and departed; John seemed to relax into him, sighing softly, "Did I catch you off-guard again? Should I start making it up to you?"

"No. It was nice," But he kissed John anyway, not even caring what people thought of them as they passed by; when they pulled away, John was grinning and James felt his own lips curling too, "Billy noticed though. So he'll be nagging me about it for a while."

"Sorry about that."

"Don't be, it's worth it. He thinks you're a keeper," John felt another wave of embarrassment rush over him, no-one had ever said that before, he always saw himself as a one-time guy too, he'd never even officially been a _boyfriend_ yet, but things were going so smoothly, it was almost too good to be true, "You look fried. Sorry if it's too much for you, Billy can get like that. I shouldn't have brought it up."

John shook his head, swallowing before he spoke, "No, it's just odd to me. I'm not...Really a relationship type of person, I didn't think anyone would ever see me that way."

"Well, Billy does. And so do I, these things aren't supposed to be easy, but I wouldn't have it any other way. I know this nice little place, it'll be quiet there," James took John's hand and John happily followed; they ended up at a secluded, back-alley ice cream store, James was right about it being quiet too. It was late, the sun almost completely set now and not many people were out, they found a near-by bench to take a seat, sharing a bowl of vanilla ice cream, "I like being with you, you don't care about my Deafness. For once, it isn't something that makes me feel like I'm being held back, I can be open with you and I'm comfortable."

"To be honest," John was nervous, even his hands shaking slightly as he continued to sign and James took them, smiling at John, "Sorry, I'm just nervous. I haven't stopped thinking about the kiss we shared," He swallowed, digging out the courage to speak his mind, "I want to be with you. That sounds so weird," John looked away, chuckling nervously, but James only held his hands tighter, waiting, "I do really like you and for once, I want that relationship. I want to experience everything with you, I don't care if it ends up as a pile of ashes, I want to take that risk."

James gently pulled John's face back, his fingers soft and confident, "I do too. I want to meet your friends, since you've met mine and I want to say: this is my boyfriend. No matter what might happen, I feel like I _belong_ with you, like this relationship will last." Then they kissed, the ice-cream forgotten on the bench besides them, but that didn't matter, nothing did. It was just them.


	6. Issues?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Charles tried to throw a wrench into James and John's relationship.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alternately titled: BackstoryTM.
> 
> Little warning, there's some rather unsavoury things said by Vane, just be careful, it's all in the flashback, after the split and all in italics.
> 
> Enjoy guys!

John had learned that not only was Max fluent in French and English, but she knew perfectly how to sign and he wondered why she never mentioned it before; she was probably just waiting to spring this on John and see his reaction. James seemed to be getting along with her anyway and while John couldn't quite keep up with a majority of their conversation, he'd gotten the gist of it. They were talking about him, but not to be rude or secretive, she was telling James stories that would make John redder than a beet, he didn't mind though; he sat there and watched, when she finally bade her goodbyes, to head to work, James grinned and pulled him close, _"I love her. I can see why you're friends."_

_"I don't think her girlfriend will like that. She'd fight you for Max's love."_

James grinned and John was certain he wasn't going to like whatever James was planning, _"Don't I have a boyfriend to protect me? One who might get jealous when I like his friends?"_

 _"I'm not jealous. Max is a great girl,"_ James was probably just messing with him but John did feel a little offended. Something like that wouldn't make him green-eyed, he wasn't even jealous of whatever James' previously had with Charles, he was always annoyed at how the guy always acted so smug, but not jealous, _"Shut up."_

 _"I'm not talking, see, my lips aren't moving."_ John leaned over and kissed away the grin that James seemed stubborn enough to flaunt. At least James couldn't start signing while they were busy kissing.

"How inappropriate, in a public space."

Just like that, the moment was ruined, John clenched his hand, hidden by James' body. Why did Charles have an obsession with them? "I'd say it's inappropriate that you keep running into us. Almost bordering on stalking."

"If you say so," Charles scoffed, he looked to James with a grin that made John feel far too uncomfortable, he couldn't imagine how James was feeling right now, _"So, I'll assume you've let him fuck you? It's usually all you're good for."_

John fumed, he was ready to jump and snap at Charles, but a gentle hand at his waist relaxed him back and he looked to James, surprised to see him smirking, _"It's hard to compare, considering all I've got to go on is barely feeling anything."_

"Fuck you," John almost sniggered at Charles' response, he looked pissed off though and John didn't want to poke the bear, _"I'm surprised to hear that. How old is he? I didn't think you were a cradle snatcher, how can he even work out the top from the bottom."_

Now John was **definitely** angry, he was independent and smart enough to choose who he dated, and James wasn't old! It wasn't any of Charles' Goddamn business anyway, _"Taking that much of a dig? At least I can get a date, I'm not desperate enough to pester my ex."_

For a moment, John thought Charles was going to hit James, he could see how much Charles was fuming; but instead, he flipped off James and departed, _"What an ass,"_ James grinned at John's reaction and pulled him into another kiss; John felt like he could truly enjoy this moment, when they finally pulled away, he couldn't stop smiling, _"You know, I don't care about him."_

_"I don't either. But I'm glad he isn't getting to you, I know he'd been a thorn in our side."_

_"I never care about what people think of me, right now, the only opinion that matters is yours. I'm dating you, not him, he can shove whatever he thinks."_ James smiled, he did really appreciate that John didn't care about anything Charles said, it truly made him happy.  
  


* * *

_Charles always knew how to get his own way, it didn't matter what it was; money, people, objects. He could work his way around every situation, so when he faced a challenge like James, he wasn't going to back down, he'd do anything to climb into bed with him. Charles put up with classes to learn sign language and he even spoke to Billy, who he knew was James' closest friend, learned more about James and got to practice sign language._

_When James finally agreed to go on a date with him, he couldn't have been happier--well, it was the first step to achieving what he wanted, he didn't really care that much about a relationship, but James was mouth-watering and irresistible, and Charles could picture all the ways he'd have James._

_So, he pushed through and Charles finally got James into his bed, it was the best he'd ever had. He was very glad to learn that James was a bit of a freak in the sheets; it seemed to bring a new confidence to James too, he started wearing his hearing aids more and Charles was glad to talk like a normal person again. He didn't hate signing, it was just time consuming, so he always tried to convince James to put his hearing aids in when they went out together._

_As time passed and their relationship grew, Charles could sense James distancing himself; he eventually asked Billy who shrugged and curtly replied, "Try treating him like a normal human, not a hindrance." But, as Charles tried to worm his way back into James' good books, Charles soon realised it was too late to save the relationship; so he twisted everything._

_"You know I love you, I just wanted to help. I don't mind signing, but my friends get confused. Sometimes I talk to you by mistake and it makes me hate myself, it feels like I'm pushing you out and I don't like that. I want my friends to be able to include you without me around. You do understand, don't you? I'm sorry if I offended you."_

_Charles was sure he saw James melt at those words; he was glad it seemed to be working, "No, of course not! I love you too, it was just making me a little uncomfortable. Billy was worried about me, so I told him that I'd speak to you."_

_"Let **me** know if it's ever too much. I'll understand." The kiss they'd shared had Charles leading, soft but controlling, the way that had James feeling overwhelmed and hot under the collar..._

_After that, things barely improved and James became sick of it all, it even made his skin crawl when Charles touched him; that was all he wanted, James wouldn't turn blind eye to it any longer. With Billy's help, the relationship went up in flames; James couldn't help but feel like Charles had some sort of lingering hold on him though._

James woke, cold and alone, he was sure he could still feel Charles' hands on his skin, it made him feel nauseous; he walked to the bathroom and quickly washed his face, trying to shake away the sensation. James thought he'd gotten passed all this, it was in the past, maybe seeing Charles so much was bringing back some bad memories; **no** , he shouldn't let this get to him, it felt silly. James sighed and headed back to bed, grabbing his phone from his bed-side table; he scrolled through his social media, hoping to distract his mind enough to fall back to sleep. That's when he saw a gorgeous picture of John at the beach, it was a shared memory from two years ago; it made James swallow, his breath a little unsteady as his eyes raked over each inch of flesh.

James couldn't help but reach down to his boxers, his length growing at the thought of seeing John like that in person; he thought of those lips--the soft lips he'd already kissed, the ones he knew so well. How they would feel around his length; it made James feel warm and comfortable. John filled his every thought, it felt like heaven and the image of John touching him almost felt like a reality.

When James hit his release, he gripped his phone tightly, panting as he slowly settled into the sheets; once his head cleared, he put his phone back and dragged himself to the bathroom to clean up. James didn't think about it until he got back into bed, he felt settled and safe, even the thought of John--regardless of how dirty those thoughts might have been, it soothed him enough that he could fall back to sleep, any trace of Charles forgotten.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, Vane is a prick. Someone might just say, a little hung-up, he can't let James be happy.


	7. Next Step

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James and John open up to each other.

James knew that something had shifted in his own demeanour; it felt strange to him because John was oblivious to it, James also didn't want John to know, that would only create more awkwardness between them. James didn't want to cause a rift and it would feel worse if John was the one to push him away, John sat back in his chair, surveying James, _"I can tell that's something's wrong. Don't be scared to tell me."_

 _"I had a bad dream about Charles,"_ At least he wasn't lying about that, there was just more to it, _"I think seeing him around just brought back some bad memories."_

John took James hand, smiling softly; James' stomach fluttered and he felt a little guilty for not telling the whole truth, John only let go to sign, _"I'm sorry he's affecting you like this. What he's doing is wrong, I know it must be hard but you can't let him get to you."_

 _"Hold on,"_ James pushed away from the dining table and went to go grab his hearing aids; when he returned, John shot him a curious look, James took a deep breath then spoke, "I was thinking about you, it really helped me forget he even existed and the feeling was amazing."

"I'll always be here if you need me, you helped me before and I really appreciate that. I know how it is to feel so helpless but you chase that away from me," John chuckled, he stood too, taking the few steps to close the distance between them, "I think about you a lot too." He had a feeling that he knew what James meant but he kept his words careful-- **tepid** , he didn't want to over-step the mark.

"John," James' breath was a little heavy, his pulse racing; he kissed John, holding him close. John felt a little blown away, he grasped James' arms just to have an anchor; James' hands wandering over his back to his ass, John happily sighed against James lips, rubbing his hands against James' biceps. The kiss broke and John felt like he'd been right about what he'd thought, James' body was hot against his, "Is this too soon?"

"Do you think it is?" James seemed to pause at John's question, before slowly shaking his head, "I don't either. You know how I feel about you. For me, sometimes it feels overwhelming, I've never felt like this before."

"I feel the same, I don't know if I'm overreacting half the time. We've been taking things slow and I really enjoy the time we've spent together but I can't stop thinking about you, it's driving me insane."

John kissed James again, he couldn't quite find the words he wanted to say so he thought it was easier to express how he felt into a kiss; John's hands explored the feel of James' body, enjoying how James was responding to his touch. Each touch got returned in kind, James felt a happy warmth spread through him, John's hands were breathing a whole new life into him; he broke this kiss when his hands brushed past the tight stretch of John's jeans, "We should go upstairs."

John nodded, he didn't trust his words to stay steady, he knew they'd be heavy with need; he took James' hand in his own, they headed up to the bedroom together. Their clothes were quickly discarded onto the floor and they fell onto the bed together; lips seeking touch and hands wandering, they were both lost in each other. James' hands trailed down to John's thighs, he pulled away a little when his fingers touched the top of John's prosthetic.

James paused, hands steady on John's thighs; John saw the uncertainty in James and he smiled, reaching up to take a hold of James' face, "It's okay, take it off, there's no rush," James' fingers followed the trail of scars on John's thigh, they were like lightning, leading to the ground; he carefully, slowly loosened the prosthetic and slid it from John's thigh. James placed it to the side then gently ran his hand over John's thigh, "James." John's voice was soft and breathless, James looked at John; John felt like he'd been punched in the gut, there was pain clear in James' eyes, as if he was trying to take it away from John. It made john feel incredibly special, he knew James was there for him, holding him close enough to protect but softly, like he was precious.

"John, you truly mean a lot to me," John pulled James into a kiss, sighing through his nose as James' hands slid up to his crotch; John felt the same for James, he felt it within every inch of his being, like a calling. James' hands were almost like fire on his flesh, slowly touching him in the right spots, working him sweetly; John had to break the kiss to breathe, gasping as a finger circled his hole. He wriggled against James' touch as he moved away, "Hold on, there's no rush." James repeated John's words, smiling softly; he leaned over to retrieve lube and a condom from the bed-side table.

John watched, trying not to let his impatience eat away at him, he did want to savour this and not rush a single thing; James rolled on the condom first then squirted some lube over his fingers. James softly pressed his index finger to John's hole; slowly, he worked loose the tight ring of muscles, John sighed as the finger began to work him open. A second one joined, James had to bite his lips as John began moaning, his hips slowly rocking into the pressure of the fingers; James found no resistance when he slid in the third, John let out a choked groan as the stimulation from James' fingers shot right to his cock, "James--James..." His voice was breathless, heavy with need and it made James moan softly; he slid his fingers free, quickly smearing lube over his length.

James had to steady himself, he took a deep breath as he pressed his cock to John's hole, watching as he sunk easily into it; he gripped at John's hips, sliding the rest of the way in. John's hands reached up and he gripped on James' arms, taking slow-shallow breaths as he accommodated to the change, "Are you okay?" John nodded at James' question, James held himself still for a moment, giving John the chance to get used to the new feeling; John felt grateful for James taking it careful, he slowly rocked his hips, moaning softly as a shock of pleasure rippled through his body. James' lips fell open in a soft gasp, he rubbed his fingers against John's thighs, slowly following the movement with a thrust; John groaned, low and deep which sent James' brain spiralling, his cock twitching in response. He thrusted again, met by another roll of John's hips; slowly, they settled into a steady rhythm, their groans of pleasure building.

John felt a little overwhelmed, he pulled James closer, hiding his face in James' neck; James held tighter onto John, he felt heat tumbling through his stomach, begin this close and so intimate with John was amazing. One of his hands slid across John's skin, brushing past the hardness of his length; John let out a soft gasp, his hips bucking against James and in response to it, James' thrust came quicker, his fingers curling around John's length.

Their noises grew louder, James slowly jerked John's length, pressing soft kisses to John's forehead; John's fingers dug into James' arm as he felt his release building, he tipped his head back, smothering his groans against James' lips. James' groan rumbled in his throat, his own release calling to him; his hand slid quicker over John's length, aided by the wetness of pre-cum which drove James on, meeting each roll of John's hips with a strong quick thrust.

John broke the kiss with a gasp, "James!" His head tipped back, as deep groan spilling from his lips and his hips bucking quickly against James; James held John steady as he could, his own groans growing as he felt John spill over his hand, soon his own release was shaking through his body, "James," John's hands rubbed against his arms and over his back, slowly, they rocked together as the height of release left their bodies; James carefully pulled away, his softening length sliding from John's hole, "That was amazing."

James smiled, he pressed a soft kiss to John's cheek, "I'll get a wash cloth, is that okay?" John nodded and James kissed him, reluctantly pulling away to go to the bathroom; John smiled as he relaxed against the bed, he couldn't quite believe just how gentle and nice James had been with him. It was something that made him incredibly happy, when James returned looking a more presentable and holding a cloth in his hand; he smiled at John which made his stomach flutter. James cleaned John down, using a couple of tissues to dry the wetness, he threw the washcloth into his laundry bag and the tissues into the trash; he joined John again on the bed, wrapping his arms around him, "Thank you John, it's nice to be treat like a normal person and not an accessory."

"James, you deserve to be treated like a king. The way you touched me, _God_ , you make me feel like I'm floating. No-one has ever treat me so nicely before."

"You deserve every ounce of it. We should get dressed, I have an idea for dinner." John nodded, but they didn't move; John cuddled closer to James, enjoying the embrace for as long as possible.


	8. Serious

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John takes a leap.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A short ending to this story.  
> If there's an interest I do have [a post]() on my Tumblr with more of an explanation. 
> 
> Quick TLDR though: I'm no longer going to be writing for the SilverFlint fandom (I might come back), I need to focus on my medical health at the moment. Thanks for having me <3

After a long, hectic day, John couldn't wait to meet up with James and relax for the evening; their relationship felt closer since they'd been intimate and John could feel three words constantly banging against his head. Every time they were together, it was like magic; they could be casually talking about a movie they wanted to catch or joking around with each other, and it felt like they'd been doing it for years--John hoped and assumed that James thought the same thing. He finished up cleaning tables and shot a quick goodbye to Jack, before he was heading out the door; he smiled when he saw James waiting there for him, _"Hey there gorgeous."_

 _"Hello. Thanks for coming to meet me,"_ John wrapped an arm around James, they fell in-line, heading towards John's apartment; John signed with his free hand, _"I have a surprise for you."_

_"Oh really? I wonder what that is. You're getting a lot better at signing."_

_"Well, I have an additional teacher who gives me great rewards,"_ John grinned, of course he would never complain about the sex, it was amazing; but being with James, cooking for each other and walking down the street together without a care in the world, or doing whatever, it felt a million times better, _"I learn really well from you, definitely a hands on experience."_

 _"If that's what you call it,"_ James smiled, shaking his head at how John was acting; he knew it was playful and he loved it, because he still knew that John was serious about the teaching. They soon reached John's apartment, John quickly saw them inside and they dropped down on the sofa together, _"So, what's this surprise then?"_

 _"Can't wait? I thought I was the impatient one,"_ John grinned at James, who shook his head in response, _"Well, as you know, Max has been helping me learn sign language between my classes, there's one thing I've been struggling with."_

_"I could always help you out."_

_"I figured it out,"_ John smiled, he took James hands for a moment, running his fingers across the skin; he took a deep breath then sat back, slowly signing the words floating in his head, _"James, I love you."_

James felt like his breath left his body, warmth spread though his chest, even as he saw the nerves twisting John's face, _"I love you too. Were you struggling because of your nerves?"_

_"Yeah, I was working it out with Max how to get my expressions right, without making it seem like you needed to reply." ___

__James smiled, it was soft and comforted John, _"You would never make me feel like I needed to tell you that. I felt it too, I've been thinking about it a lot recently."__ _

___"I'm so happy you feel the same, all my thoughts have been like mine too."_ _ _

__James pulled John into a gentle kiss, his thumb stroking across John's cheek as their mouths moved together; when they pulled away, neither could stop smiling. John held James' hand, pressing it softly to his chest so James could feel the beat of his heart; he never wanted this to change between them, it was perfect and John felt like his nervousness only evaporated and turned into more love for James. He wasn't sure if he could contain it all, so he was beyond that James felt the same, they could contain their love together; it was all they could wish for._ _

**Author's Note:**

> _EDITED._
> 
>  
> 
> I'd also like to reiterate a point **again**. For James disability, I am basing it off what I've personally experienced with having a deaf gran and what she's told me/what she's faced with her disability. She uses hearing-aids and sometimes relies on people to relay certain information or give her a helping hand. Now, I'm not saying every single deaf person can/will use aids, this is based off her experience as a non-born deaf person too.
> 
> It also came to my attention that some phrases/terms I used were offensive. I don't have a beta reader, but I do run everything through my friends that are a part of the LGBTQ+ community (the minority doesn't speak for the majority though). I always have used these various terms/phrases in the past, for other pairings too, without upsetting people, along with approval of people I trust; it isn't easy to change my naturally used language but I am trying to learn--which sometimes includes a change, so moving forward I will ensure that my words aren't coming across as offensive.
> 
> Thanks for understanding. Never be afraid to reach me on my [Tumblr](http://caelumswriting.tumblr.com) if something is an issue and I will work on fixing it :)


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